When Light Dies
by Ame-san
Summary: One man's mistake ushered in a new era and brought together lives that were linked by wars. Heero's story told from Odin Lowe's eyes. This is the history before A.C. 195
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Do I look like someone who owns Gundam Wing? That's right, I don't. If I did, I wouldn't be here writing this story. 

Dedication: To JennJenn-san aka Michiko84, Steh-san, and Lau. 

When light dies

Chapter 1

When light dies, shadows fear darkness,

Darkness despises night, night falls alone.

When light dies, violets clothe in black,

Roses cry in tears of blood, blood stains alone.

When light dies, bells ring mute,

glass shatters in silence, silence sings alone.

When light dies,

he is lost.

A.C. 175.

"...the colonies should not initiate violence against the earth. We are all the same; after all, we colonists came from Earth; we have our roots extending all the way to that beautiful planet. Let us embrace this peace we have now and never seek to destroy it. Please remember that peace is not a principle, but the hope of mankind in this universe. No one can live without hope, and wars shatter that hope, that light which guides us toward peace. For those of you out there who are determined to protect this peace, please do not be impulsive on your actions. In order to achieve total pacifism, one must possess the right means, the right actions. It is possible that the end will not justify..."

_Total pacifism? A naive old fool._ I positioned my body flatly on top of the cement roof as I lowered my weapon of choice toward the speaker on the podium. _Target in sight._ I focused my right eye through the shooting range making sure that the one bullet would land on the man's upper left body, penetrating his heart at once. _Good. An easy job after all._ I pressed the trigger with skill knowing that I have accomplished the mission with success. Screams of fear and sorrow engulfed the crowd from below, but I walked away silently not caring, not wanting to care like every time I complete the job in public. The noises would eventually die away, and the blood would eventually be cleaned off as if nothing ever happened. 

I did not care about the means, only the end mattered to me. It didn't matter if the end justified the means as long as it brought food to me. Food was what kept me alive, not righteous means.

_Time for my pay check._

A.C. 180.

" For the last time, I will not take this job. I have stopped taking jobs like this years ago." I shot a glare at the man who dressed in an expensive black suit and spat disgustingly at the floor, removing the dirt from my mouth. He didn't back down easily with that smirk plastered on his disgusting face. 

" Mr. Lowe." He paused glancing through the vid-phone as if trying to see the inside of my gloomy apartment. " I can tell that you need some money to remodel that shack of yours. Am I right? This would be a perfect opportunity for you to get some extra change, don't you think?" 

That smirk of his, that stupid cocky smirk of his. I wished it were him that I was supposed to kill.

" All you have to do, Mr. Lowe, is to finish this guy for me. You can have all the money you want with just the press of a trigger." He brought up an empty check. " See this, you get to fill that out when the job is finished."

" No." Money no longer had its lure on me. I have stopped being a victim. 

" But you'll be doing a good deed too." The man changed his tactics. " Your target is the leader of a local rebel group on Colony L1-X17001. What do you say about that one? You'll be getting rid of a person who threatens peace between the colonies and Earth, you know. It'll be a chance for you to become a hero. A killer to a hero. Quite the difference? Think about it, Mr. Lowe." 

" No." I terminated the link and spat once more at the floor. _Killing the leader of a rebel group? Right. These rebels had been the protectors of the colonies. They were our last defense against Earth. And Me, a hero? _ I stared at my reflection from the darkened empty vid-screen. A man with ebony hair and deep void blue eyes stared right back at me. No, it was a monster, a demon, not a man. The man died a long time ago, only a fiend was left to laugh at my pathetic existence. _A hero. I killed the only hero we had or will have. _

No time to waste on my sinned past, I was certain that Hell had a seat waiting for me. Until then, I had to keep on living in my personal Hell. _Which means that I have to make my escape as soon as possible. First rule of an assassin: never stay at one place too long, especially after refusing a job opportunity. One becomes the target of another if one refuses the job offered. Running away is the key to stay alive. I'm a coward, so what?_

I gathered the dirty clothes piled upon the carpet-bare floor and shoved them into my aged duffel bag, something I caught myself doing more frequently these days ever since the United Colonies broke apart after the death of their president. Earth, taking this advantage advanced its military presence into space. They secretly formed alliances with certain colonies, the ones that would benefit them the most of course, thus shattering the unity within the space inhabitants. Many people were enraged by this act simply because their home colony wasn't the one receiving the profit by conducting business with Earth. They were angry because of their greed and nothing else. Then there came the rebel groups. These groups were found based on the desire for self-sufficiency, self-rule. These were the people who saw Earth's furtive plot and determined to reveal them to the masses. They knew that too much dependence on Earth would cause the Earth to take over eventually and establish dictator control in space. 

_Earth cannot be granted too much power, it they do, war is inevitable. Colonists are people, they are not properties for the earth to utilize in anyway they wish._ I closed the door to my apartment and proceeded down the stairs. They would come soon to claim my life, but I knew better. I marched out of the building without turning around to take one last look back. It was after all another falling apart shack for people without money, yet I had to admit that the people here were kind to me. They shared the little food they had with me when I couldn't find a proper job; they nurtured me back to health when I was sick; they provided a family to me when I was alone. It was a shame to leave, but attachment meant death. _I can't afford to die, not just yet._

My calculation was correct to the second as the dust-covered ground shook violently in agony, causing the glass to shatter in an earsplitting shriek, overriding the sudden cries from the inhabitants inside. Then there was absolute silence for a fleeting second as time itself mourned for the broken souls. 

The explosion coming from my old apartment building caused me to lose my balance; the pressure knocked me down to my knees. I ducked out of instinct and covered up my head with my duffel bag. _They finally caught on to me._ I thought trying to get up. I dusted my clothes and checked for any injuries. None but a few scratches. _They were just a little late._ I smiled inwardly knowing that I had won. _You would have had me if I were twenty feet closer. _ I stared at the blazing smokes coming out of the wreckage in the black night feeling nothing in particular. Too bad it had caused the lives of those kind people. I shook my head and went to a nearby alley. It was still important for me to hide, for they would come to look for the body eventually. I spent the night staring at the fire, the dead bodies being carried out by the rescue team; hearing the cries of children, of mothers, of fathers, of nearby strangers. It was only another fifty lives on my hands. There was nothing out of the ordinary. _People are dead that's all. I'm sure they are at a place that's a whole lot better than they have been. _

This place had finally come to look like a graveyard after last night. I peeked out of the dark alley searching for my enemies. Founding none in sight, I decided it was safe to make my getaway now. I passed by the rubbles of my old home not wanting to stay one more second at this dead place. Daylight embraced the stillness of the dead. The remains of my damned soul froze my movement forcing me to look at the deaths I caused. It was only blood spilt on the white washed ground. It would be cleaned tomorrow. 

_ Sorry._

As I walked away a stifled cry caught my ears. Usually I would just ignore it, but this time I felt obligated to seek the source of that sound. I found it under a pile of wooden boards stacking upon one another. The cries came from underneath; it seemed to me that there was an air pocket inside. I lifted up the rubbles outside and pried open the wooden blockage. There I came face to face with a crying infant boy wrapped in an old blue rag. The stifled cry became louder as I surfaced the child out of the little cave and brought him to the light. Judging from his features, he was only about two months old. _I see that you have made a deal with god to live, kid. But you should also know that living is not easy. Life is hell, kid. You'll one day find that out on your own. _ I held him and jumped out of the wreckage. I didn't need a kid to add more burden on my shoulders, but it was I who found him and brought him to this hell. He would live because of me. He would suffer because of me. He would keep the remains of my soul. 

_You are a lucky kid to be alive. Not everyone can experience the cruelty of this world as you will with me, but you lived for a reason. Maybe there is a purpose for you after all. Think it as a privilege that you are allowed to suffer._

He stopped crying and stared me with his intense deep blue orbs. Those eyes, they were so sad. I chuckled at the sight of them. The kid probably didn't even know what sadness is. He was just another nameless kid, a nobody, an innocent nobody. I didn't feel that I had the right to give him a name. _I have already tainted his very soul by keeping him alive, I will never taint his identity too. That's for him to decide. If he grows up strong, he should be able to give himself an identity. Only if he were strong enough._

I walked off into the morning light with the kid in my arms. 

_You will survive, kid. I'll teach you how._

Author's note: This is a glimpse at something I shall be working on next year. Yea, a new project. Finally, a change for me. It's about time for me to write something serious rather than my normal comedies. Hope you'll like it. The story is inspired by Episode Zero. 


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Do I have to say it again? I don't own Gundam Wing.

When Light Dies

Chapter 2

A.C.180

So I kept the kid alive; I took him with me on my journey to Colony L1-X17001, where an old acquaintance awaited for my arrival. Not once did he cry again since I found him underneath the rubbles, not even when he was hungry or hurt. He just lay in my arms enjoying the warmth given off by my cold body. He probably thought that I was his father by the calmness he had shown. I fed him whatever food I could find as long as they were edible, breaking them into tiny pieces and forced them down his throat whether he liked it or not. He needed to be alive; I owed him that much since I was responsible for the deaths of his parents. They were lucky, his parents were of course. They escaped their fate by grabbing the opportunity I presented to them. The kid didn't, he chose not to take my present and that was why I had to keep him alive. At least until he too meets his fate. 

I sank into the seat on the shuttle after situating the kid on my left against the window. Children always loved window seats, I assumed. Finally, the both of us could get some rest after two days of hitch hiking. I was well aware that the kid was not used to traveling, but I never stopped to find a local inn en route. He needed his first lesson of survival: able to adapt to any environment. I shut my exhausted eye lids as sleep overtook my senses. 

" Nice little boy you've got there." A soft feminine voice pulled me out of my ephemeral slumber. " Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you up." It was the lady with long wavy chestnut hair sitting on my right. 

" It's fine." I nodded at her hoping she would just leave me alone now. 

" How did you do it? He is just so quiet." She didn't catch my silent request. " You've got to tell me how your son behaves so well. You should've seen my boy. He's about the same age as yours, but he wouldn't be quiet for one second." Apparently she mistook me as the kid's father.

Not wanting to cause any trouble, I acted according to her assumption wishing she wouldn't see through my cover. " He's always like that. He just doesn't cry as often as the other kids." I started making stupid out of this world stories about my "son", and how we came to be at the present situation. I lied to her that after my "wife" died, I decided to take the kid to his grandparents on L1 so I could go find a job supporting him. The story almost brought the lady to tears. Her sympathy as a new mother blinded her perception to see the truth that I was merely a fraud. She was too gullible, too kind. _She should never trust the words of a stranger, let alone the words of a killer. _

" Wait, I have something..." She trailed off and dug her hands into her traveling bag searching for the " something". " Here," She handed me a forest green infant blanket. " I bought this for my son, but I think this little guy here should have it. That old blue rug of his won't last very long." 

I thanked her and she went on blabbering about her family matters, her husband, and her son. I could only stare at her and act as if I were actually listening. Her kindness even brought her to the point of inviting me to meet her family at the space port when the shuttle landed. 

" I think my husband would be glad to meet you. Believe me, he could barely keep himself alive when I was away for the past few days. I think he should learn some tips at being a single father, if it were for just a few days." She smiled at me then at the kid sleeping nearby. I envied the kid, for he was able to rest during this whole entire ordeal. 

I complied to her request. 

" It won't be long, since we have to catch the next shuttle to L2. That's where we actually live." She paused leaning in toward the kid. " He's a beautiful little boy."

I didn't comment on her remark; I simply didn't care. All I wanted was a little peace and quiet but unfortunately, it was impossible with this lady here. I began to dread our arrival, for I knew that her family would be just the same as her. Obnoxious. 

The time finally came and there was no escape.

" Hey, look!" She pointed into the crowd at the space port. I followed her hand and saw a man in his early thirties holding an infant in his right arm while waving at the lady beside me with his left hand. He seemed very kind.   


" Come on. Let's go." She tugged the sleeve of my jacket. I complied not wanting to blow away my cover.

" Hey, sweety. Did you miss your mommy?" She dropped her luggage and opened her arms as her husband handed their son to her for an embrace. I watched in silence. 

" Honey, " She called for her husband's attention. " This is Mr...oh my...I didn't even ask..."

" Odin." I stepped in. " You can call me Odin." I shifted the Kid around, so I could extend my right hand for a hand shake. " Nice to meet you."

" Nice to meet you too. " He shook my hand. " I'm Mike. I see you've already met my wife Julia."

Julia cut in with her child in her arms and began telling her husband my " story ", of course it was just a shorter version of mine, since they had a flight to catch. Amidst her once again blabbering, I took a glance at the boy she had against her bosom. I was stunned to see that this little boy had the same eyes as the Kid, save they were violet like his father's. He also shared his mother's chestnut hair although it was hard to tell with the few thread of hair on his head. I always knew that children looked alike in their infant stage, but the expression on both of them were identical except one of them lacked the sadness in his eyes, in his _** violet**_ eyes. _He'll never know what sadness is; he'll never suffer like the Kid. How very sad that he'll be happy for the rest of his life with loving parents always at his side._

" Here, " She held out her child closer to me. " Meet my little precious, his name is-"

" Odin!" She was interrupted by a voice behind us. It was that old acquaintance of mine. " Odin Lowe!" He called out my name once more while closing the distance between us. 

" I'm sorry." I apologized to the couple standing beside me. " My ride is here. It was nice to meet you guys. " I was determined to get away from these kind people. They were too kind that it made me feel sick. 

" Well, then, you better go." She sounded disappointed. I ignored her comment and walked away toward my ride. She called out loud again saying her farewell to me. I never replied. After all, we were only passing strangers. _I shall never see them again._

" So, I see that you are doing quite well, Lowe." My forty-year old friend greeted me. His height average, hair russet but a few grays sticking out, and his attire was always casual. He was not the strongest guy I know, but the smartest. The brain behind everything. 

" Same to you, Howard." I returned the gesture. Howard was a friend that I met a few years ago while working on that last job of mine. He was then a weaponry dealer in the black market and had made quite a name for himself by selling some of the most useful technical gadgets in this solar system. He once told me that he owed all his successes to a friend of his who had built almost everything he ever sold. I myself had a few chances to acquire his weaponry on a couple of my missions; they were just simply exquisite machines an assassin could ever hope to get his hands on. However, that was nearly five years ago. 

" Lowe," He questioned me. " The last time I saw you, you were still single. Where did this little guy come from? He couldn't be yours, could he?"

" I killed his parents." I stated the fact.

" Ah, I see. Paying some debts. " He glanced at the boy with his brown eyes. " It's a good thing sometimes."

" Maybe."

" Now, let's not waste anymore time here. Let's go, the drive won't take us ten minutes."

Howard took me and the kid to his home, his base actually. It was an underground warehouse or something like it. People inside there were mostly young mechanics in those regular dirty greasy blue jumpsuits, but all of them carried a gun or two. The women too had a few weapons down their sleeves. It was rather fascinating to see how armed and alert these people were. I held the Kid and followed Howard to his office at the end of some inconspicuous hallway located at the lowest level of this underground compound. His office was just as discreet as the hallway outside. A desk, a torn couch, a vidscreen and a couple of chairs. It was nonetheless clean. We situated ourselves each in a chair and I laid the kid on the couch. 

" You should know why I'm here." I spoke in a low voice.

" Of course. " Howard stared at me then turned on the vidscreen putting on a local news channel. " You are here to warn me. They've contacted you to kill me, right?"

" They are after you." I stated the obvious.

" Now, they are after you too." He wasn't worried a bit. " You've seen the base, we are on the highest alert here. There is nothing else I could do."

" I know, but I'm also here to help and to earn some food to stay alive." 

" But you should know that this is nothing like being an assassin. We have a goal to accomplish."

" I know that, but I also have my own reasons to why I want to help you other than food."

" Oh? and what is that?"

" I can't tell you that, not just yet."

" ...and in other news today the Cinq Kingdom has officially denounced its allegiance to the Earth Alliance, condemning the organization initiating unwanted violence against the colonies..."

The news caught both of our attention to the screen, cutting off our current conversation. 

" The Cinq Kingdom?" It sounded quite familiar to me.

" Yes, the Cinq Kingdom. The same country that was mentioned by the former President Heero Yuy in his last speech before he was assassinated." Howard cleared his dried throat. " Heero Yuy had a very close tie with that Kingdom, although on what foundation we do not know."

_Now, I remember. Before I pulled that trigger, I heard him say something about total pacifism and linking it to that particular country._

" I see that not all of the earth support war against the colonies." Howard sighed. 

" That country is not going to last long standing alone on this issue." I predicted. " The Cinq Kingdom -"

I was interrupted by the cries of the kid. It almost surprised me to hear him cry after such a long time of silence. _I guess he is just a kid after all. _

" Are you going to do something about that?" Howard asked me with a hint of irritation behind his hoarse voice. 

" He'll stop. He doesn't cry very much. I haven't heard anything from him since the day I found him." I reassured him, but the cries got louder and uncontrollable. 

" You know that kids will stop crying if they have something to play with to keep them distracted." Howard offered me some advice.

" Fine." I replied pulling out my gun from the inside of my jacket. I put the safety on and took out all the bullets. " Here." I dropped the weapon in the Kid's hands that were outside of his new green blanket. 

" You are giving him a gun to play with?" Howard stared at me wide eyed.

" I don't see you got any toy around this place, do you?" My tone was sarcastic. " It'll be fine, he'll stop crying in a second." As if on cue, the kid's cries died down and he began playing with his new "toy".

" I think he rather likes it." I chuckled then turned to Howard. " Anyway, as I was saying. The Cinq Kingdom will eventually go back on its ideal or be destroyed by the Alliance. It won't last, I give it at most two years. Just you see, after two years, they are going to fall."

The kid cried again, and this time it was louder and more sorrowful. 

Author's note: Please excuse any grammatical mistakes in this story. I hope you guys are catching all the little details I've thrown in there. A couple of hints: The violet eyed child who lives on L2. The KID cries at the mention of the Cinq Kingdom. More little details to come in the next chapter. Everything is linked in this story in someway, so watch out for them. 


	3. Chapter 3

When Light Dies

Chapter 3

A. C. 182.

" So when will we initiate our next mission? " I set forward my inquiry.

" In one week. " Howard paused, then lowered his voice almost to a whisper, cold and dangerous. He didn't trust me. " Lowe, I trust your wits. You have proven yourself quite useful in the past two years. Don't go getting stupid this time."

I shifted my body in the metallic chair, never removing my gaze from him, who sat opposite of me separating by the desk, his hands resting upon the rusty surface, eyes equally intense.

" I understand. " I nodded. " Just tell me the plan and I'll follow it. You know that I'm not just doing this for food, right?" I never told him the real reason.

" A couple of friends of mine informed me that the Alliance has been secretly supplying an arsenal of theirs on L2-X20001 for sometime now. Rumor has it that it is the largest weapons arsenal in that cluster. You know what that means. " A shadow cast itself upon his wrinkled face, hiding his eyes.

" They are serious this time. They are ready to stage their first coup in the colonies. Very shrewd." I replied stating the obvious. " So we attack it? "

He merely nodded his head. 

" Do we have enough human resources? I don't think we can take them down just with the people on this base." I knew he had a card up his sleeve. All I had to do was lure it out.

" No, we can't take them down just by ourselves." Silence. Then he stood up and turned his back on me. " But we could get some help from the people there."

" The civilians? " I questioned, not surprised at all. " Don't you think that's a bit overboard? Think about the casualties. " 

" That's the only way. Besides, I'm not asking them to fight, we only need their support." His back still turned. He had yet to shed the light. " A little sacrifice is inevitable. I'm sure they would rather die than live in a hell hole under Earth's oppression."

What's your true motive? Using the civilians as human shields? It seems that's the only choice you have, right? The test lies in whether you have the guts to actually utilize such a method. Will you? 

Of course he would. 

" That's what you think." I sneered at his naïveté. " For someone as old as you, you sure can be idealistic. If we attack, with the help of the civilians, and we fail, the people of the colonies will hate us. People don't like those who bring them death, no matter which side they are on. No one wants to die."

" So they'd rather be slaves to those who conquer and oppress?" He shot back at me without facing me.

" Yes. They may despise the Alliance but as long as the Alliance doesn't hurt them physically, they'll have no real grudge against them. And so far, the Alliance has been prudent." I countered his assail. The truth was that as long as they had their money, these people could careless who ruled the universe. The Alliance was smart enough to realize that, thus the reason that they had been careful when handling the inter-space trade.

But their presence in space would always pose a threat to the colonists, causing paranoia as a result. No one likes to be threatened, certainly not the people of the colonies. 

" Don't forget that they still hate the Alliance. All we need to do is to incinerate their anger and use it against the enemy. People are fickle, Lowe. Remember that. If one rises, the rest will follow." I could hear the triumph in his voice. _Unfortunately, you will lose._

" An uprising you mean?" I got the picture, crystal clear.

" Yes. We storm the arsenal, steal the weapons and pass them to the civilians nearby. Then during the chaos, we destroy the arsenal completely." The plan was set.

" A mass revolt. Clever. The Alliance soldiers would have their hands full with the civilians, perfect opportunity for us to attack. Very clever." I applauded his intelligence. " The Alliance wouldn't be able to retaliate if they still want trust from the people. Without trust, there won't be a coup. And even they were to retaliate, the civilians who died in the riot would be considered martyrs. We don't just kill them, we offer them glory when they die. The people won't hate us because we bring honor to their deaths."

Howard was silent. He knew that I spoke the truth. 

The sound of the door closing broke the silence. 

" Who's there?" I shouted. No one was suppose to know about this mission, not until the right time. I jumped up from the chair, rushing to the door. Howard too turned to face me and the person outside. I opened the door and peeked out into the hall. It was dark without the lights on, and it was impossible to see through the opaque darkness. I knew he was there.

" Come out, Kid. Show yourself. " I could sense his presence.

The Kid, two years old now, walked in catlike quiet out of the shadows. His legs tiny but also agile in those little blue shorts. He slowly approached me and when he reached the door, I grabbed the collar of his white cotton shirt and dragged him in, hurting him in the process. He didn't let out a single whimper. I had made sure that he was used to the roughness of life. 

I brought him in to the light of the office. Howard relieved a sigh. It was after all a two-year old Kid.

" Lowe, better watch out for him next time. " He sounded irritated. I ignored Howard.

" Were you outside the whole time? " I asked the Kid in a harsh tone. 

He nodded, not afraid at all. I had made sure of that. Fear was unnecessary and should be hidden beneath the exterior. 

" We are truly getting old, Howard. We couldn't even sense the Kid." I looked at him, still behind his desk. He glanced at the Kid and told me to take care of him.

" You've trained him well, I guess. " He motioned me to take him out of his office. 

" Kid, go and fetch some water for me. " I commanded, then patted him on the head showing the only kindness I possessed. His dark brown hair was sparse and soft, his eyes stared into mine with the same sadness from before, it never left him. 

" Yes, Odin." He spoke in his tiny voice and smiled returning his affection, although that smile didn't quite reach his lips. He turned and ran out of the office. 

" Why did you say that to him? " Howard was confused. 

" Make him useful. " I said.

" But he'll just come back." 

" He won't. He knew better."

" A two-year old?" Howard chuckled at my silly remark.

" He knows me. He can sense when he isn't wanted like a pet, a dog. " I reassured him. 

" He's quite the kid, then." He sat back into his chair as I did mine. " Have you told him about his parents?"

" Yes. He knew that I'm not his father, and I told him that I killed his parents."

" I see, does he know what parents are?" He asked.

" Yes. The female mechanics told him about it, they also bought him clothes and candy." That's why I had to be cruel to him. Too much kindness could blind the Kid, I had to take the job of showing him what this world was really like. 

" He doesn't know about the concept of killing, does he?" Howard asked again.

" No, not yet. He is too sheltered living on this base. He is too normal as a Kid. Too kind." I answered. _But a person needs that kindness too. It brings the little hope one needs to survive._

" Don't you think he would want revenge for his parents when he eventually understands?" He warned me.

" No. He would want revenge from me for keeping him alive, not by killing his parents. The concept of parents will always be foreign to him but not the concept of living. He will hate me for keeping him alive." I shook my head in acceptance. _And he'll do that soon._

~ ~ ~

I looked for the kid around the base hoping to find him before we depart for L2. He was probably captured as a hostage by one of those mushy almost perky female mechanics. They would constantly praise his tiny features using such garbage as cute, and sweet. It made me sick every time when I went to claim him back to the real world. The Kid knew better though, he was keen to sense that those types of affections were fake, and would lose their effects after a while, but he seemed to be fond of them nonetheless. For sometime I could swear that he was manipulating their kindness to earn their absolute trust and use it to his advantage, in other words getting what he wants without having to work for it. I would have applauded for his shrewdness, but then again that would have made me a victim to his game too. I knew him too well to fall for the trap. Knowing him well didn't mean that I cared. My only job was to give him food and the rest was up to himself. I never took notice of him. I didn't care if I missed his first word, or the time he took his first step. I only cared if he was alive. 

I saw him near the vans where the mechanics were busying themselves with the loading of our weapons for the coming mission. He was sitting in the shadows of a corner watching and listening. I walked over to him.

" Come out to the light." I ordered. 

He complied and stepped out of the darkness. 

" You never left, did you? " I asked him about what happened a few days ago. 

He shook his head, eyes stared into mine. "No."

" You heard everything that was said afterward then?" I continued.

He nodded.

" Good." I patted his head once again. " I'm going to another colony for a few days. You are to come too. There is something you need to see, to learn."

He nodded even though he didn't quite understand it.

" You have to listen to me when we get there. And don't go wandering around without my permission. Understood?"

" Yes." He said quietly but firmly. I knew he would disobey me when the time comes. 

" Good boy." I lied. 


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I don't own GW, this is just for fun.

When Light Dies

Chapter 4

A.C. 182

"...as of this moment, people of the colonies, we must arm ourselves against the oppressions of the earth. Everyone here knows that because of over population on Earth, we the working class people were sent away to live in the resource limited space colonies while the rich ruled the planet alone. We complied to this arrangement with the hope that they would just leave us in peace. We thought that maybe this way we could finally escape their absolute control, their exploitation of our lives, our soul. Then we found out otherwise. Even with the millions of miles separating us, they still manage to take hold of our lives, we are like dogs on a leash controlled by these neo-aristocrats. No more! The time has come for us to retaliate once and for all, we will not be slaves again. The people of the colonies are a new race of human beings, no longer are we the dependent workers. It's time for change! We must claim our independence! We must fight! Are you with me?!..."

Applauds and roars came from the crowds underneath the podium. As we expected, it was quite easy to tackle that weak spot in these people's hearts. All they needed was a little push and encouragement to let out their anger. No, it was not their anger, it was their rage. 

I glanced at the man on the podium again and directed my attention to Howard who stood beside me against the cold, bullet proof vehicle. He looked pleased with a hint of smirk on his lips. 

" Nice speech he delivered there. Did you write it? " I asked while gazing back at the speaker and the enraged mob around him, shouting, cheering.

" As a matter of fact I did. It's working very well, don't you think?" Howard replied almost excitedly.

" Sure, why not. It's working perfectly to get those people killed." I spoke with a tone of sarcasm.

He paused completely losing that smirk of his. The fire in his eyes remained but somehow it felt cold and dark.

" Hn. It's the only way. Unfortunately, a little sacrifice is necessary." He ran a hand over his forehead. " By the way, I still don't get it why you insisted on bringing the kid with us. He's only two years old." He pointed toward the inside of the metal covered vehicle at the small occupant. 

" You know very well why I brought him, Howard. " I lowered my head and stared at my boots. " When will it begin?" 

" Patience, Lowe, patience." He peeked at his watch. " Patience."

" It's unfortunate, isn't it?" 

" What the hell is wrong with you, Lowe." His sharp glare could penetrate a layer of metal.

I ignored him and watched our men passing out munitions to the civilians. Men, women, old, young, were all armed with weapons ready to give up their lives for something they believed, something great, something that would make them heroes. 

" It's time." Howard gave out the instruction. " Lowe, get ready. There will be no failures in this operation, you hear. I won't allow it."

" Hn." I didn't believe him. 

" Hey, you over there!" I called out to the female guard near our carriers of weapons. " Watch out for the Kid!" _ Don't forget to let him out,_ I added silently. 

" Yes sir. " She saluted.

* * *

" Go, go! Everyone get into your position!" I ordered. Howard had given me a small squadron of twenty people to command, and I was supposed to be responsible for their lives. To hell with that! There is no "we" on the battlefield; there is no need for a hero.

In the distant the march began as our man who infiltrated the crowd shouted incendiary chants. One by one the people followed with their blind rage and sang the song of their freedom. It was their last song, the song of their deaths. " Down with the Alliance! Down with Earth! Down with Oppression!" 

Like the wave of a tsunami, they swallowed completely the street in front of the Alliance's arsenal. Still, it wasn't enough to conquer their hunger for blood, for revenge and lastly their hunger for freedom. The crowd moved like a fluid but as more and more people joined the march, they became a single bubble of rage, waiting for the moment to burst. In that distinct moment glass would shatter, sound would mute, and blood would spill to cover the flower fields. That was my mission, to help to create that moment of total destruction. 

The Alliance soldier who was guarding the entrance of the arsenal was no longer standing erect on his post but trying to calm the crowd with feeble effort. He held onto his weapon tightly with trembling hands as fear slowly consumed his inside. He was after all still a boy, but we only saw him as an enemy. The crowd pushed onward trying to break the iron gate of the arsenal where they could join the soldier on the other side, except their goal was to destroy it rather than defend it. The young soldier panicked as they neared and pointed his gun at the people. 

" Nobody comes near, you hear! N...no...nobody comes near, or I'll ....I'll fire!" His voice was broken as his body shook violently. He was only thinking of his duty and nothing else. " I'll say it one more time! Don't come near this gate!" 

His voice was lost in the cries of freedom, and the crowd pushed on with their bodies as they congealed together into one giant steel ball. Someone fired into the lock system of the gate and the barrier was broken. Without waiting for his back up to arrive, the soldier aimed his gun and shot into the crowd. He wanted to be the hero of the day, yet he failed to realize that heroes never live. Never fully comprehending what he was doing, he fired continuously at the already enraged mob. Bodies began to fall but they were soon forgotten as the people directed their anger at the lone soldier. Several shots were fired at him and he too fell to the ground as his blood began to soak his gray uniform. It was an instant death. The mob crossed the barrier and paid no heed to the soldier's body as they stepped on the corpse. It was a soldier they killed, but it was a boy that died. 

The back up troops came numbering in the hundreds, and one by one they lined up in a human barricade with their guns aimed at the civilians. The mob continued onward without fear ready to give up their lives in a second. 

" They wouldn't do it. They wouldn't dare do it." One of the men in my squadron commented as we trailed behind the shield of the angry mob. We were cowards.

" You think?" I questioned without looking at him. I couldn't stand his confidence.

" I think? I know so. They wouldn't risk so much to fire." 

" That guard fired, didn't he?" 

" He was inexperienced. He fired without a direct order from his commanding officer. He was just an ignorant boy, he doesn't know any better." He explained.

" And we killed him." The conversation ended right there.

He was wrong though, they did fire. The undeclared war has finally begun as fear, anger, death, and confusion all mixed together into a whirlpool where civilians and soldiers alike were drowned. Our units were broken up and the last thing on their minds was order. Men ran like animals amidst the chaos. Screams could be heard a mile away and the so well coordinated plan traveled down the drain without a single hope to retrieve it. I hoped Howard was happy with the result. He should be, after all he was the master mind behind of it all. 

I fought my way through the chaos firing at soldiers as well as some civilians who had gone wild in the head. There was no need for these crazy people to run around hurting people, was there? The mob was pushed back over the gate and out of the arsenal. The soldiers, however, didn't stop the shooting but kept on going like robots controlled by the men inside the building. Nearly half of the original mob had vanished during the riot and this was only the beginning. Even the civilians who didn't participate in the march was now caught in the bullet rain. The mob spread out in all directions, some running for their lives, others fighting for a lost cause. 

"Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!" A child screamed on top of his lungs desperately wanting the world around him to hear his plead. " No! Mommy! Wake up, Mommy! Please open your eyes!!" The shrieks could tear open one's heart into pieces. It made me tremble. " Mommy! Mommy! I'll be good now, please wake up! Just wake up...wake up...please...please..." It got so loud that my ears pained, yet no one seemed to hear the cries. To them the sorrows blended in with the smoke, the bullets, and the corpses. The plead continued but the voice died down as his hope disintegrated. " Mommy...mommy...no...what's wrong...mommy...please...please..." 

I could see the child's mouth open yet no sound came out of it. It was as silent as the night. His hands covered his tear stricken face. Around him, bodies fell, fires burned, footsteps quickened, and once in a while legs kicked the child in the ribs making him fall too onto the blood washed ground. 

I got near enough to him to see that he was now coiled up into a ball and was sobbing in pain. "No..." When he opened his eyes, I was surprised to find them a shade of violet. The same violet I saw two years ago on the shuttle. He was Julia and Mike's son. 

Another wave of footsteps came and carried him away when they were gone. I lost sight of him. 

* * *

It didn't take much effort from me to get back to the van where the Kid was supposed to be kept at. Of course when I opened the cool steel door, there was no one inside. I hoped he were able to witness the bloodshed, to hear the sorrow, to never ever forget these images, and I hoped he had died. 

" You, there. Come out and show yourself!" I readied myself for combat. I knew he was there when I first arrived. 

A man in a torn Alliance uniform dragged himself out from the back of the other vehicle. In his hands was the Kid pressed close to his captor with a gun pointed at his temple. I saw fear in both of them. 

" Drop your weapon!" The soldier demanded and held on to the Kid more tightly as he squeezed the tiny arm with great strength. The Kid let out of a whimper but it was subdued immediately. 

" So what if I don't? Shoot the kid? Is that what you want to do?" I smirked with my gun still aimed at him. " Using a kid as your shield, how very brave." 

" Shut up, or I'll kill him!" His body shook with fear and anger. 

" Go right ahead, if you can kill him before I kill you." 

" You wouldn't dare!" His hands trembled. 

" Odin." The kid stared at me with his sad eyes. Then he lifted his head up and stared at his captor. " Why? " He was afraid but only I could tell. 

" Shut up! All of you just shut up! I've had it enough with you! I'm going to kill you!" He pressed down on the trigger. 

_Bang._

The soldier leaned forward then fell onto the ground with a bullet hole in his head. The kid, unharmed, went down with him for the man was determined to hold on to his prey. They hit the dust with a loud thud. I wiped the smoke off of my gun. 

" How stupid. He is better off dead anyway." I went over to the Kid. He broke lose the hold but remained beside the corpse. I bent down too to see what had caught his attention. 

" Why, Odin? Why? " His Prussian blue eyes gazed down at the dead soldier. 

" He's dead, kid." I simply stated the fact. " I had to kill him." 

" Or I would be like that too?" He asked. " What is 'dead'?" 

" Dead? It means that he can't never wake up anymore. He is no longer in this world, and his family will never see him again. He is lost to them and he'll never return. That is dead, Kid." 

" Will they miss him?" 

" They will, and they'll seek revenge to kill the person who took him away from them." 

" Why don't I miss my family? They told me my daddy and mommy are dead, but I don't miss them. I don't want to kill anybody." His eyes traveled back up to meet my own. I could see tears forming around those blue orbs. 

" I feel bad, Odin. Really bad. " Tears dropped down onto his cheeks. " But he's not my family." 

" Don't feel bad about anything, Kid. He's dead, that's all. I don't want you to cry, you hear? If this happens again, I don't want to see any of those tears coming down your face, or else!" 

He wiped them off at once and stood up with an already dried face. 

" There you are." It was Howard. " I see that you are still alive, Lowe." He was not in the best of moods. 

" A successful mission, Howard?" 

" Lowe, I don't want to discuss it and that's final." 

" How bad was the casualty?" 

" 46 deaths and about one hundred wounded on the civilian side. We lost another 19 from our special units. " He sighed. " I was only trying..." 

" There is no point to explain." I grabbed the Kid's hand and started out to check on the wounded. 

" Lowe! Where are you going?" 

" To do some good for once." I didn't stop. 

" Instead of helping the wounded, why don't you go help at the orphanage. They've got their hands full today. You are good with kids, you should go." 

" I'll go where my mind takes me." 

" Well, if that's what you want. We are still staying with the scientist, you know where that is." He left too to clean up the mess he created. 

" So Kid, wanna go pay a visit to the orphanage?" A pair of violet eyes stared at me from my memory. 

* * * 

" ...the end of the riot. In other news today, the Cinq Kingdom fell under Alliance military attack for violation of Article XI..." 

The last of Heero Yuy's legacy was destroyed. 

"...there were no survivors..." 


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing; this is just for fun.

Author's Note: Oh man, it's been ages since I last updated this story, but here it is. BTW, sorry about the grammar mistakes before this; I haven't had time to beta read them as I first posted them. I'll do my best to revise as I go along. Please bear with me. Thank you! 

When Light Dies

By: Ame-san

Chapter 5

A.C. 183

" Are you sure you want to leave here?" 

" Yes."

" Well, you do realize that you don't really have anywhere else to go, right?"

" I've made my decision." There was a brief silence. " Thanks for having me, Howard." I turned to leave.

" Wait, " He called after me. " Before you leave, I have something to show you. Who knows, the next time I see you, we could be in hell." He laughed and then motioned me to follow him.

Howard, always liked to be discreet, led me to the new lab that was prepared specially for his scientist friend. Professor G was not present, but I saw something that resembled a blue print lay on the table. The detail of the print was beyond comprehensible. It was like a drawing of a giant robot but much more complicated than ones I'd ever seen in my life. 

" What's this?" I pointed at the piece of paper.

" Do you know what a mobile suit is, Lowe?" He was talking in circles.

" I've heard of it but never had the chance to see one in person. That's the new weapon the Alliance is developing, isn't it?" I began to have an idea what he was getting at.

" Well, at this point in history, not just the Alliance has the technology to build such a machine." He hinted.

" So you have it too, but what's the significance of telling me that?"

" Lowe, you don't get it, do you? You don't understand the power of a mobile suit."

" I get the destructive power of those suits; I just don't get why you would be telling me your little secret. Aren't you afraid of me selling that information and get you killed?" 

" I'm not really concerned with my death at this moment." 

Another brief silence past between us.

" So what does that thing do?" I asked. 

" We call it the Tallgese. It's a special type of mobile suit, much better than the ones the Alliance has. We are not sure at this moment how powerful it can be, but trust me, this thing can destroy five of theirs without breaking a sweat." He had a vicious smile. 

" You are quite confident about it. Confidence can be a weakness sometimes." I warned him.

" Not this time, Lowe. The Tallgese is only a prototype to something even greater, something mankind has never seen in its entire history, something mankind will fear and bow down at its feet for mercy." He was quite serious. 

" To have mankind at its mercy? Such thing will not last long."

" But at least it will free the colonies." He argued.

" Then what? What are you going to do with it after you've accomplished your goals? As long as weapon like that exists, people will fight over it."

" When did you become a pacifist, Lowe?"

_When that bullet hit the chest of Heero Yuy._

" Don't insult me, Howard. I'm only saying that you might be making a mistake."

" How so?"

" I'm not a seer, how should I know? But I do wish you luck finding someone who would do your dirty work for you. That thing will need a pilot, right? "

His silence confirmed my speculation.

" No normal people would have the guts to kill and destroy with that thing; I hope you can find the monster who would. " I had just about enough mobile suits for one day. 

" Thanks for your support, Lowe." He hissed out the words and then decided to change the subject. " So where are you going now? Taking up the assassin's job again?"

" Sort of." I walked toward the exit. " I'm going to visit the earth."

" Earth?"

" I have a job to take care of there. Someone to kill down there."

" Well, see you in hell then."

****

" Where are we going, Odin?" He asked timidly. His footsteps quickened to match my pace. 

" That's nothing of your concern, Kid." He was after all only a shadow. He could only exist as long as I live and I never did make promises. 

I slowed down and came to a halt. He stood next to my legs and stared at me with those sad eyes. I knew he wanted to ask more questions, but my glare shut him up. There was no need for questions; he only had to follow orders. Then again, there were those eyes.

I looked around and said, " We are setting up camp here tonight." That was an order. The nice thing about Earth that I liked was it had natural bushes and forests, good hiding spots indeed. The little light left from the dying sun made it possible for me to pick a secure base for our camp. Between the tall pine trees was a clearing about four or five feet long and three feet wide, quite sufficient for me and as for the Kid, he never did take up much space. 

Knowing very well of my intentions, he began gathering broken tree branches for a fire. I got to admit that the reason I kept him alive was his fast learning abilities. I never had a child before, but I knew he was much more intelligent than the average kid. He had never forgotten a thing I had taught him. 

" Just put them over here. " He complied without a word. I searched for my lighter and lit the fire. He just sat nearby silently and stared at the burning flame. 

I was fond of the silence.

" Odin." His voice destroyed that one moment of peace in my life. 

I waited patiently for him to continue.

" Why do you never take me to the park?" I hated how he had learned to speak in full sentences. 

" I'm not obligated to do so. It's not my job." I was slightly irritated.

" My daddy would have, right?" I hated his innocence. 

" NO. But he's dead anyway, so just live with it. Don't think of things you can't have." I kept up my icy tone.

" Odin, why did daddy and mommy leave me?" I hated the fact that he was growing up. 

" Because I didn't kill you, that's why. I was damn stupid to keep you alive that's why." 

He seemed to understand the meaning behind my words and became obedient and quiet once again. He pulled his legs against his chest and lay down in a fetal position, his cobalt eyes empty and distant except the reflection of the crimson flame. 

I sighed. Sometimes one just had to follow one's emotions. 

" I've never told you a bed time story, have I? You want to hear one?" 

He didn't respond. 

" Well, did you know that a single person can change the course of history?" I paused. " One mistake and everything you've believed in and tried to believe is gone, and you can't do a damn thing about it. The sad thing is that you are still trying even though you know is fucking futile. That's what's so stupid about the guy, he's got too much hope and tries too hard. It's like he's doing everything he can to fix that one mistake, but in the end he knows he'll fail. Well, it's not like he's got anything else to do. "

The Kid's eyes were closed. I looked at the black sky and saw the flickering lights of the colonies. 

"It's easy to change history, but it's damn impossible to reverse it. The only way I know how to fix a broken vase is to buy a new one and teach it not to fall again. Train it, so it won't ever break even if it did fall. Break it so many times that it doesn't know how to break anymore."

He was asleep now.

" You know what Kid? Not everyone went to the park, some died when they weren't even born." 

* * *

The next morning we arrived at the airport; apparently, the person I was looking for had changed his address several times in the last few years. _Figures, he probably knew that I would come for him eventually. _

" Hurry up." I said to the Kid. " You don't want me to leave you here, do you?"

He seemed tiny amidst the sea of people who were trying to get to their own destinations. A rather significant group caught my attention as they marched toward my direction. I could see that it was a bunch of annoying reporters surrounding a particular family like bees around honey. 

" Mr. Dorlain, Mr Dorlain, would you care to comment on the current situation with the colonies? What's the next step for the Alliance? Is it true that you are planning your first visit to L2 at the end of this months?..."

_So that was the newly elected Vice Foreign Minister from Earth. _ I stood still and watched him and his entourage of reporters walk past me. _Too much of an idealist._ I passed my judgment as I saw the genuine look in his eyes. He was too kind. _Kind people like him can't survive long in this time period._

" Let's go." I ordered the Kid who seemed not to hear me. He followed the flashing lights of the camera as if in a trance. 

Emerged from the wave of journalists was a little girl in a pink dress. She seemed to have dropped something on the ground and was now trying to pick it up. But to no avail, she was carried away by her mother to keep up with her Vice Foreign Minister father. 

" No! " She squirmed in the arms of her mother. " No! My Teddy! Mommy, I dropped Teddy!" She cried.

Before her mother could say anything, she wiggled out of her hold and ran back toward the stuffed animal on the floor. 

The Kid got to it first. I was curious as to see what he would do with it. 

" That's mine." The little girl demanded. The Kid stared at her for a second then gave her the bear. 

" Relena. Relena, aren't you going to say thank you?" The mother had arrived, and I knew it was my turn to make an appearance as well.

" He took it." She was now pouting. 

" Relena." Her mother lowered her voice. 

" Thank you." She said rather reluctantly. 

" I'm sorry." The mother spoke to me apologetically. " I don't know what came over her." She smiled. " You've got a nice little guy there." 

I merely nodded. She smiled again, took her daughter by the hand, and led her away.

" You deliberately disobeyed my orders." I scolded the Kid who still stood there watching the little girl disappear from our sight. " Are you listening?" 

" Yes, Odin." He turned to face me. 

" You are wasting my time." I dragged him by his collar the rest of the way. 

He didn't wince at all even though it was leaving a mark on his neck. 


End file.
